We now know

Hi All

Well we now know, mum's cancer is spreading, she has small cell carcinoma in her lungs and breast bone, they want her to start chemo immediately, she asked to have the weekend to think about it, but when she got home the hospital rang and wanted her to come in, she had bloods taken and the results were not good and they needed her in to monitor her and to get her bloods back to normal. I went to see her yesterday and was shocked, she looked very grey and very ill, in a few days she had changed so much.
Mum has made a decision and has decided she does not want to have the treatment, she had spoken to the doctor that morning and has been told she has about 6mths,  she may change her mind, but for now we have to accept her decision and make the most of the time we have left with her, it will be very hard. By the time we left we had got mum laughing and joking, my dad and I spoke about it on the way home, and he is going to tell the rest of the family her decision.

On a bit better note, I finished my stable, thank god I have minis to keep me sane and occupied.
I am very pleased with this project, I always wanted a horse so this had made my dream come true, even though it is in mini, I have my imagination. Have a look

Mondodifavola: { Giveaway time ! }

Mondodifavola: { Giveaway time ! } enter this great give a way,

I am making progress

Hi All

Well mum goes to the hospital tomorrow to get the results of her lung biopsy, we should know what they are going to do and what the prognosis is, I am praying hard for some good news.


Anyway lets talk about my project, I have done a lot more to the stable,I made some shelves for the tack room and added some bits to it, I was surprised when I opened my my box of stash I had collected for this project. I have so much, more than enough for the shop that is going to go along side the stable, there will be a surprise for you as well, I have an idea for the shop, it will specialise in something special, I just have to work out how to do it, I know I never make things easy for myself, but I love a challenge and buggar is this one going to be a challenge.

Well I have bored you enough, have a look at my photos and see what I have done

back to doing miniatures

Hi All

My mum is still waiting for treatment to start, she had a biopsy last week and then hopefully we will know what they are going to do.

I will admit I have been very depressed, which is unlike me, but this time when normally I can switch off and get on with other stuff, for my own sake I had to get back to doing my miniatures, so I have decided to do something that I had an idea for some time ago,

I want to do a stable with a small tack room, a small area for the horses and a shop that sells all kinds of horsey stuff, but also specialises in  Arabian horse costumes, there I have told you now, so I must do it. I have not made it easy for myself, I cannot find much in miniature in this subject, so I am using my imagination  and hopefully it will work.

So let me show you what I have been up to.

this is what I had to make into my stables

one of my horses, I made a dividing wall, the smaller side will be a little tack room

using egg cartons for the outer stone work

I used lolly sticks for the floor

base colour for the stone work 

I used mount board for the roof, cut and shaped to look like tiles and then base colour added

saddle holder and saddle

2 saddle holder made from balsa wood

Well there it is I have started.

just to let you know

Hi All

Mum saw her consultant today, they have said her cancer has spread, she is to have a ling biopsy next week and then he will know how to treat it.

Slightly confused, as he has said it is treatable not curable, but how can he tell if he needs to do a biopsy to find out what type of cancer it,  anyway, I am going to go over a couple of times a week and my dad has now given up his part time job to become her carer, I just want to spend as much time as I can with my mum.

I will still be doing my minis, I need to it helps to distract me and for a while I can lose myself,  I have physio Friday so I am hoping I can start to do more with my arm.

So that's it my news for now, 

life carries on

Hi All

yes life carries on, just thought I would let you know an update, I have had my stitches out and able to move my arm more, got physio soon. I have been doing a few minis, just tiny stuff. I am busy sorting through my bead collection. Its one of those jobs that you never get round to doing.

My dad has decided to sell off his railway collection and he is giving me some of his storage cabinets and drawers, I can always make use of them. I will have the job of putting them on ebay for him. 

Now for my mum, she has an appointment next Wednesday, so we will know then what he is going to do. She has not been to good, the Doctor put her on steroids to try to ease her breathing. I spoke to her last night and she was very upset, she even said she would ask the Doctor to send her to hospital as she was so fed up with feeling so ill, I found this very upsetting and had a few tears when I came of the phone, for my mum to say that, she is someone who would never go into hospital for any reason. I feel so helpless, I am not able to go over very often, I ring her everyday sometimes twice a day, I am going over tomorrow just to be with her.

I am someone who never talks about my feelings and am always the one who every one turns to and am re guarded as the strong one,  I just want someone to be strong for me, to hold me and tell me it will be ok, I am dreading next week and will be waiting at her house for her to come back.

I lost my dad when he was 56, it was sudden and unexpected, I lost my daughter just before her 4th birthday and I knew she had a condition tat was slowly killing her, and I do not know which is worse, the sudden or the waiting. Looking at my mum now I do not know how she can carry on, her breathing is so bad, she struggles every day,  I want to take it all away, hold her and never let her go. My step-dad is trying so hard to be positive, and he comes over to see me, for me to hold him and comfort him. 

I sit here now, with tears flowing, but in some way this is giving me comfort, know I can write my feelings down and you care, thank you all for the support you are giving me, I know on here I can say what I feel.

well life goes on and I had better put on my smile and face the day ahead

A quick update

Hi All

Just thought I would pop in and update you all on what is happening in my life.

My shoulder is gradually recovering, I am able to move it, but only from the elbow, I am no longer on any extra pain control, I exercise everyday, and can move my hand and lower arm quite easier now. The nurse is still coming in twice a week to do the dressings and I should have the stitches out later this week.

My mum, we are still waiting to see what the doctors are intending to do,  she is very positive and says she will beat this. My brothers and I went over on Sunday, is was a lovely visit, some tears, very positive thoughts and lots of laughter, it is not very often that we all get together and my mum really enjoyed it. I was a bit shocked at the amount of weight she has lost and how tired she is. I ring her every day and try to visit as much as I can. It is difficult as I can no longer drive, so I have to rely on others for transport. 
I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all your kind words and wishes. it gives me a warm feeling to know you care.

It makes me think, we do not know each other, we have never met, but through the web, we are able to communicate, give support, encourage and laugh, you are always there, its like having a new family, that you can talk to, you never judge, you are just there. I for one am very grateful that I have you to turn to.

I am missing my minis, but I am trying to  be productive during my in-forced rest, I am sorting out my work room, labelling and creating better storage for my minis. Yesterday I decided to put white card at the back of the small cubby holes in my printers drawer, and then put my collection in a better order, they look very good now, and my tiny minis stand out and can be seen better. I will try to get a photo for you to see.
I have gone through my fabric stash (how did I get so much) and separated them into boxes and labelled them, patterned, checks, silks and so on, will be a lot easier for me when I am looking for fabric.

I now want to go through all the furniture and small miniatures I have collected and sort them into bits I want to keep, by the time I am able to start making minis again, I shall be so organised, but I bet it will not take me long to muck it all up.

I have been keeping up to date with all your blogs and I follow them with interest.
I have been collecting ideas for my next lot of mini making, so you see I am not being idle.

Don't you find Pinterest addictive, I have spent a lot of time on there, just looking at every thing that interests me, but once you start, you cannot stop.

so that's it a little update, see you all soon